Denied

Against my better judgment (there really should be an "e" in that word), I did some reading today. I see what my Sixties profs are doing with the readings, grouping them by identity basically, but so far, I can't say I'm too impressed. The ones we had to do for last week didn't move me at all, but I decided to write my first response paper about two of them. I've jotted some notes in the margins, as well as in my notebook and it turns out I've already reached the required five pages. Of course my thoughts are all over the place and I'm not sure I make my point. In fact, I feel as though I have written myself into a circle. The good news is that these five pages are literally shit that just popped into my head. Because I haven't been in the mood all day today to go back to it, I haven't. I will save that for tomorrow night. The paper is due Wednesday. Elizabeth K. (Race and Gender prof, not therapist) e-mailed another Dickinson poem tonight. I'm still not enthralled with it all, but will have to sit through a discussion of it tomorrow, which I'm not looking forward to. I also managed to stay away from most of the sports that were on television. I realized I was using them to get out of my head. I did watch Germany beat Switzerland (was it Switzerland?) in soccer. And I watched a little baseball. After a really pivotal conversation with Cornelia, the details of which will stay with me, I decided to head to Madison Square Garden to see the Spurs. Surely there would be $10 tickets left. There weren't. The cheapest tickets they had were $45. Sucked. I also hung out tonight with a guy I work with who is also in my program (1st year). He lives around the corner and we ran into each other on the street. So we hung out on my deck. It was nice. And that was my day. The paragraphs are short, my thoughts now are limited, and so I am going to bed. A much better bed time than the 5 am one I managed yesterday. I really need to sleep better. I keep having bad dreams. Don't know what the fuck that's about. Dancing for me isn't happening this week. Cornelia and I plan on going a week from Thursday. Oh! And is Nicole Kidman with Lenny Kravitz? What the fuck? Can't wait to see her next movie. One thing I think I forgot to mention about last week -- one good thing -- is that my first issue of TCDS' Bulletin is finished. Complete. I went to the printer twice in two days, one to turn in the material and one to sign off on the product. It's all done. Joel, the printer guy, shook my hand and said it was the smoothest it's ever gone. Sweet. He also bought me breakfast and we chatted about random stuff. That felt really good. I'm pretty sure the issue is mistake-free, but I've seen crazier things in my day concerning the art of publishing. So we'll see. It's supposed to be back to us by October 20. I have a feeling it's going to go over very well. The bottom line -- and I deserve to speak highly of myself for a minute -- is that I started this job with little to no knowledge of TCDS and what it's about. I quickly perused past issues, which didn't really matter, because all of the material changes. When I started the gig, I was told of the day they wanted it to be back by. Going backwards from that, I realized I had basically three weeks to get it done. I did it. And I'm proud. I kick ass when it comes to editing stuff. Ok. I'm done.