The Power of the Word

I've recently read some of Audre Lorde's words. The power she injected into her writing doesn't merely swirl around my mind as I read. It gets in me. Gives meaning to the energy I feel. It's not only the energy of rejection. Or writing. Or even sleeping, which I don't do enough of anyway. It's the energy of love. It has me wanting to tell every woman worthy of me that I love her. That I love her presence in my life and love the peace that she offers me. The gentleness of her gaze and the understanding in her voice moves me to emotions that I want to express, but have nothing on which to express them but paper. When I have the time I will do this. I will keep it to myself until I get a response from her out there who feels the same emotive power of the word. Of feelings. Until she can tell me that she, too, loves me. Loves my presence in her life. I don't know when this will come. Maybe it never will. But that I have had the opportunity to feel the power of this emotion makes me lucky. Makes her lucky. Whoever, wherever, and whenever she may be.

Every minute this week unfortunately has been accounted for. The temptation to call in sick to work tomorrow (today) is overwhelming but I must not do that. That's one job. And the other job requires me to meet a deadline that has already gone by. I have to write a cover letter, so I can apply for a job I found today. I have to edit for my third job. I have to pack. Do laundry. Cook salmon. Clean my house. Get cramps. Take too much advil. Sleep too little. And love too much. All this before I get on JetBlue to then occupy every minute of my spring break that has already been accounted for. I am overwhelmed.