Why in the Hell Did I Move to NYC?

And more importantly, why do I live in lower Manhattan?

I decided to eat a bowl of ice cream tonight to soothe my throat (I'm getting over a cold) and thought I'd peruse the news before I went to bed. I heard Bushie talked tonight so I wanted to know when we were going to attack. That wasn't a smart thing to do. Although I just found out I have my own problems to worry about....despite the usual ones about girls, exercise, and money.

First, my problem.Remember that abstract I submitted for the Liberal Studies department? Last week, I found out unofficially that I was rejected. Marcela saw the list and did not see my name on it. I was so relieved and took it as a sign that I had much more reading to do before I would anywhere near ready to present my ideas (whatever they are) at a conference. This was relief was short-lived however, because when I got home tonight, there was the following message in my inbox:  The organizers for the Liberal Studies conference, "The Politics of Language," would like to congratulate you for having been chosen as conference panelists. Each panel will consist of 3 panelists plus a moderator and will last for 1 hr 15 min. You will have 15 minutes to present your material in order to leave enough time for discussion following the presentations. Please also bring hard copies of your work to the event and be prepared to send a copy to a moderator at least a week before.  I know I'm an alternate. The use of the plural form of "panelists" suggests that a mass e-mail to the original group of those accepted was sent previously. No matter. Also, the want my "material." I don't have any material. It's in my head. And what's worse, it's in an unfortunate state of confusion. The conference is April 9. The moderators need the papers a week before -- April 2. Uh.... I have two weeks. Guess I better get this straight then. But maybe I won't have to worry about it.

We're going to war. Let's go into this for a bit, shall we? Now, I accidentally went to CNN.com. I don't like to do this really. I usually get my news from the BBC. I like what they have to say about the U.S. So we're going to war. Ok. This is what gets me, though (and brings me back to the whole why do I live in lower Manhattan issue). I quote from one CNN.com article: "In a conference call Monday evening between CIA officials and the nation's governors, officials said the intelligence community believes there is a near certainty of attacks that would involve mass casualties with maximum economic, psychological and symbolic impact."  BUT  "In the meantime, as on the other occasions when the national threat level has been increased, we encourage members of the public to continue their daily work, family and leisure activities with a heightened awareness."  I wonder where they'll hit. Fortunately, Tom Ridge has announced Operation Atlas (what the hell is up with these names? Operation Liberty Shield is another doozy). This is the big plan to "bolster security throughout the city." More soldiers, more dogs, and jet planes apparently ready to strike. This was my favorite item in Operation Atlas: "Cancellation of New York Police Department classroom training, except firearms training." Quit teaching them how to be "good" cops and just teach 'em how to kill. Oh but wait, guns don't kill people; people kill people. That's right. Never mind then.

The next few days are going to be interesting. All this and I have to figure out my identity issues in two weeks. Not to mention prepare for three 15-page papers, which is nothing compared to the papers I had to write last semester. I wrote eight pages this weekend for the flatulator. I was pissed about that the entire time I was writing. And my throat is burning. My friend Bill (some of you may remember him as my first roommate in Sacramento) was in town tonight for work. We went to dinner and caught up. It was fun. And I actually had fun in my Spanish class tonight. I almost didn't go. And I was close to resigning myself to the fact that I can't learn another language and so I was thinking of dropping the class. Then I went and had fun. So I'm staying in it. Not that I'm going to live long enough to use it. I was also rejected as the Liberal Studies student advisor. Unofficially, though. This is the problem with knowing people. You get the scoop but sometimes it's premature or just plain wrong. I'm pretty sure about this one, though. If I'm still alive next fall, I'm going to apply for an internship at Routledge Press. Go to your bookshelves and see how many titles they publish. They're a great publisher and I was talking about them way back when I was drinki-- er -- studying in Chico. I wouldn't have been able to do the internship and be the student advisor at the same time. So I'm going to open myself up to that possibility. If things go as I plan, then I might have decent chance of being employed there after I graduate. I have no idea what I want to do with myself after I'm done, by the way. I wouldn't mind making money. Settling down. Getting married. Just kidding. I don't know. I have no right to be thinking of that now anyway. I've got bigger fish to fry.